I'm gonna need a tardy slip please

there are some crazy hard choices to make as a parent...

like...
when you realize that your 'sick' kid might not be as sick as he was the day before and could...should...actually be in school....

so how do you think the school would react if I brought my child to school a little late...

like 40 minutes before school lets out, late....?

me....yes, um, I'm gonna need a tardy slip...
office lady...really?  it's 1:10
me...well, my son was sick yesterday, and I thought he might still be sick today, but it looks like he's much better now.  so here he is!
office lady...you know school ends at 1:50, right?
me...um, yes, I'm aware that school dismisses in 40 minutes, but he's all better now...so, um, give him some learning, you got 40 good solid minutes....

you were born for this

our daughter had a rough entry into the world...
and a few more bumps around year 3...

when we tell her about her birth miracle and healing at 3 we remind her that God has a plan for her life.
(yes, I know...he has a plan for everyone's life)...
but we tell her that 'someone' tried to stop her from being the person she was meant to be.

that she is meant for greatness...
and not greatness in the view of the world, but greatness in how God views her...

this past week we had the privilege as her parents to witness her allowing God to live thru her and not to let 'someone' else control her life.

This is a Bible verse that we've talked about as a family,
" Therefore, to one who knows the right {or good} thing to do and does not do it, to him it is sin."
                                                                   ~ James 4:17

and that is what Madison did, she knew the good, and she did it!
She started middle school last week...
She was worried about changing classes...
getting lost on the campus...
not finding her friends at lunch...
not having ANY friends in any of her classes...
of all that scary homework....

one thing that she went into the year knowing was that even if she had no classes with her friends...she at least HAD friends.  She has 2 really good friends going to the same school, and lots and lots of kids from the past 6 years of school all on the same campus...
she was good...

We did encourage her to meet and make other friends....
not because we don't like her friends, we do...
but she has 6 classes and her 2 friends are in NONE of those classes...so life will just feel better if she has a friend or two in some of those classes...it will be less lonely...
she wasn't out there to find replacement friends...
     just add to her friends...you know...
...make new friends, but keep the old...
....one is silver, the other gold....
she just maybe needed to add to the silver list...

day one...
she notices a girl in her 'core' class with the same backpack as her...
(core is the new term for homeroom...and just to make things confusing for us old school parents...core isn't always your first class of the day, you might end your day with core!)
day two...
she starts talking to matching backpack girl*...
(*special blog note...her name is not actually matching backpack girl, that would be weird, but to keep things safe I will not be using actual names besides Madison's)
she's  nice...
day three...
more talking...she's really nice...maybe we can be friends in 'core' together...
day four...
finds out that matching backpack girl moved from a k-8th school so none of her friends moved over to 6th grade but stayed at the k-8th school...
matching backpack girl is shy and worried about making new friends...
day five...
Madison invites matching backpack girl to eat lunch with her and her friends...

day five lunch time...
Madison and matching backpack girl see Madison's friends at 'their table'...
they walk to the table and Madison begins the introductions...
"old friends, meet matching backpack girl...matching backpack girl meet old friends."

only...one old friend doesn't wait for introductions to finish, but packs up her lunch and leaves in a huff...
other old friend stays at table but turns and talks to other kids at the table and ignores Madison and matching backpack girl...well ignores her while also making weird snotty faces in their general direction, (lots of exaggerated eye rolls and hair tosses)...

Madison tries to talk to old friends...
M..."what's going on?"
OF's...."we don't like matching backpack girl!"
M..."why not?"
"she didn't share her new ball," says one old friend (really are we in kindergarten?)
Madison asks matching backpack girl about the ball thing
matching backpack girl, "it was a new ball and I wasn't letting anyone play with it."

Madison thinks...
I've known matching backpack girl for 5 days, but she's nice and she's shy, I don't think she's lying about the ball thing...she even agreed with old friend that she didn't share her ball, but she had a good reason...

Madison goes back to old friends...
"how about you meet her and talk with her, she's really nice."
OF's..."you choose her or us!"

Madison thinks...
Matching backpack girl has done nothing wrong...
     my old friends are being rude and mean...
          friends don't try to control you, bullies try to control you...
Madison chooses to eat lunch with matching backpack girl...

Madison comes home and tells us what happened...
we tell her we're proud of her...
we ask if she wants to call her old friends and talk about the situation...
she doesn't...she wants to wait over the weekend and see what happens on Monday...
maybe everyone was tired from the long first week of school and sports try-outs...

Monday morning...
old friends approach Madison before school starts,
"so who are you going to choose her or us?"
Madison said,
"I'm going to choose her, she hasn't done anything wrong!"


Matching backpack girl talks to Madison is class...
telling her it's okay if she hangs out with the old friends, she can tell they don't like her and she doesn't want Madison to not have her friends.
Madison said,
"no, you've done nothing wrong, I am going to stay with you!"

Meantime...I am frustrated...
of these 2 old friends, one is a REALLY REALLY good friend, they've been in class since 2nd grade
     (sorta a big deal when you have 120 kids in the same grade!)...
how can her friend not trust her?
why can't she broaden her friendships?
why are we back at this point of drama?
(we had friend drama for Madison's first 3 years of school...
until she found this really really good friend)
after lots of inner-turmoil I decided that I needed to talk to the mom of her really good friend...
we as parents have always trusted her parents,
we're on many of the same pages when it comes to parenting our kids....
and I would want to know if Madison had done this to one of her friends...

I find really, really good friend's mother and we talk...
I ask her if she knew about the drama on Friday...
what drama?
...nothing...
really?  what consumed Madison all weekend long and made her feel sick going back to school today and her daughter had told her nothing...
so I layout the whole story...
also remembering that although Madison is a sweet girl, her story is HER story and old friend's story might be different and might 'feel' different from her side of things.
Madison may have been seeing things thru emotional goggles...
one of the biggest issues I have with this whole thing is
     I like...really really like...her old friend.
they belong together...they GET each other in a very special way...
they are supposed to be friends...we love old friend's family...
not just her parents but her siblings as well...
Madison and old friend NEED to be together

And that is why I am so proud of Madison...
she knows all this...
she gets this...
she knows how hard those first 3 years of school were...
she remembers FINALLY finding old friend,
she remembers when they were new friends...
she can't imagine life without old friend now...
she also loves old friend's family...
but she knew that when friends were telling her she had to choose...
choose them or matching backpack girl...

Madison, heart-breaking, knew that matching backpack girl had done nothing wrong for these friends to tell her she couldn't be friends with both, knew she needed to choose the unknown, she couldn't choose her old friends, her friends that 'get' her, if her 'friends' were telling her she had to choose then her friends had changed and Madison needed to stay true to herself and choose the scary unknown, because even though it was unknown it was right.
(seriously...how many of us adults have been faced with choose old comfortable but wrong, and the unknown but right path...and chosen the comfortable wrong path?)

back to my talk with old friend's mom...
she's frustrated...
she knows Madison and she knows her daughter
and she knows that Madison wouldn't have made up this drama...
that Madison had been hurt (and maybe still being hurt) by her daughter
she knows her daughter did something painful, hurtful, and wrong...
she is pretty frustrated with her daughter....
she's going thru that, 'what did we do wrong?' as parents thing...
I am reminding her about that old thing we call free will...
she can teach her daughter everything right yet, her daughter still has to choose her own path...
this isn't a parenting issue, they didn't raise her to do this to old friends and potential new friends...
yet, as parents we have that small glimpse of God's pain, when our children make the wrong choice even when they know the truth...
old friends mom was ready to go home and tear her daughter apart...she wanted to yell at her and then have her call and apologize...I wanted that to...
but then we got to thinking...our girls are getting older...having their mommies make them 'kiss and make up' isn't what they need.
our girls are in middle school...
they're 11 1/2...
they might not always tell us when a friend has hurt them...
they are at the age that rather than a demanded apology the hurt child needs to approach the one that hurt them,
and say, "hey, you hurt me!"
    "What you did wasn't okay?" 
 they need to ask,
     "Did I maybe do something that caused you to react this way?"
they need to learn that mom isn't going to always be there to fix it...
but they can learn that when mom is still holding their hand...

so old friend's mom still had a nice long talk with old friend...
...and her dad did some talking too...
they asked her "why?"
"had matching backpack girl done something to her?"
"does she know matching backpack girl?"
etc, etc, etc...
they walked her through how her actions hurt her closest friend
how she hurt a girl that she did't even know (matching backpack girl)
how she embarrassed them
how they were proud that Madison her closest friend stood up to her when she was making wrong choices

and then we had Madison call her...
Madison was the one that had been hurt,
she needed to call her friend and tell her,
"you hurt me...
"you didn't act how a friend should act...
"I want to be your friend but I'm not going to chose you over matching backpack girl, because matching backpack girl has done nothing wrong!"

Madison had to make the stand...

she needed to initiate the conversation...
    not her mom or old friend's mom..
she needed to learn that her mom isn't going to always be the one to fix all the wrongs
but she could still do that with her mom sitting next to her.

She was amazing...
she said,
"I need to ask you why you've been hurtful to me?"
"Why you are being mean to my new friend?"
"Why you are asking me to choose?"

Her friend asked for forgiveness
she didn't know why she was being mean, but knows it was wrong
maybe she was being influenced by another friend,
     but that was wrong of her to allow her to dictate her actions.
she wants to talk to matching backpack girl and tell her she is sorry,
     ask if she'd be willing to try to be her friend even though she was mean to her

Tuesday morning...
old friend is in library and hour before school...
....so is matching backpack girl....
they are the only two in the library...
...old friend approaches matching backpack girl...
asks if they can talk,
tells her she's sorry for how she was acting,
wants to know if they can start over fresh...
can we all be friends?
matching backpack girl says yes...

old friend has some time to hang out and get to know matching backpack girl before Madison gets to school...
and guess what?
she likes her, she really, really likes her
matching backpack girl is a good person...

there were other 'characters' in the drama...maybe ones that aren't as close, maybe some that influenced old friend's behavior, ones that aren't interested in trying to be friends with matching backpack girl ...
but maybe it's time to distance ourselves from those friends...
move them from 'close friends' to 'I'll-say-hi-to-you-in-the-hallway' friends...
     or maybe even, say good-bye altogether...

Beau and I are so proud of how Madison stood up for right in this situation...
we know that we've 'taught' her to do right, we've instilled in her life God's truths
coincidentally (or not) her youth pastor just finished a series on
    being who you are, not someone else!
last weeks lesson was on Esther and living into who God made you to be...

we also know that this was/is not about us,
   this isn't because we did the right thing as parents...
or that her youth pastor just finished an amazing series

good parents have kids that make bad choices
     and horrible parents have kids that make amazing choices...

this was/is about Madison...
in a difficult moment she chose right!
     not easy,
         not comfortable
               not the known...
she made the moral choice, the good choice, the one that God was leading her to make

Her greatness...that God has planed for her...
     ...is her being her...
living her life and being the person God has planned her to be...
she was born to be this tenderhearted, empathetic, friend...
to stand up against 'evil'
...yes, I said evil...
girls being mean is the opposite of goodness and righteousness
therefore...they are acting out in evil...
Madison was standing up against sin....

Madison...you were born for this!

"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." (Edmund Burke)

monkeys+apples+caramel=lovely

so this most amazing thing happened Saturday morning...

I was throwing around the idea of making monkey bread for breakfast
...please don't tell me you have no idea what monkey bread is...
(yep, I'm healthy like that)
and so I look around the kitchen to make sure I have what I need...
and I did...
and then as I was standing there cutting the biscuits I remembered my mother-in-law making a monkey bread recipe sort of thing a few years ago not with refrigerated biscuit dough but with frozen roll dough (I think) and then I think she tossed the dough balls in a sugar, cinnamon, hot chocolate powder mixture...

yep...
I said hot chocolate powder....
so I decided to see if I had any packets of hot chocolate...

I DIDN'T have any hot chocolate...
but I did have packets of apple cider...
I started to close the cupboard in sadness when a little voice said,
"why not apple cider?"

and then....
this is the moment that all the stars aligned and perfection was born...

I ran to the computer and searched all of the world wide web
(aka pintrest)
for anything close to a Caramel Apple Monkey Bread recipe...
and guess what...
it didn't exist...
because if it's not on pintrest than it hasn't been invented yet!!!

nope, brand-new invention...

so I ran back into the kitchen and became giddy with my new found power of creation!
and thus pure awesomeness was born...
please...let me be the first to introduce you to

Caramel Apple Monkey Bread!
2/3 cup Brown Sugar
1 1/4 cup butter
2 teaspoons Cinnamon
3 cans of Buttermilk Biscuits
1 1/4 cup Sugar
2-3 packets apple cider drink mix
2-3 apples cored, sliced and chopped thinly

1.  Preheat the oven to 350 degrees & grease your bundt pan.
2.  Place your butter & brown sugar into your bundt pan and place in oven while it's pre-heating. Keep an eye on the butter/sugar mixture while it melts and becomes one, open up the oven and stir ever few minutes until the two have become caramel goodness. Once the brown sugar and butter married, you can pull it out of the oven and wait for the biscuit nuggets.
3.  While your butter/brown sugar (aka caramel) is melting in the oven...open up all three cans of biscuits and cut each biscuit into quarters/nuggets.
4.  Next, in a 1 gallon zip-lock bag, combine the white sugar with 2 teaspoons of cinnamon & apple cider drink mix packets (2 for a mild flavor, 3 for a slightly stronger flavor).  Drop all of the biscuit nuggets & chopped apples into the cinnamon-sugar mix. Once all the biscuit nuggets and apples are in the bag seal it and give it a vigorous shake. This will get all those pieces unstuck from one another and nicely coated with cinnamon-sugar-apple cider goodness.

5.  Take the caramel...(butter and brown sugar) out of the oven, mix it up good and slowly spread these nuggets out evenly in the bundt pan, coating them in the gooey caramel-ness in the bottom of the bundt pan.
6.  Bake for about 30 minutes until the crust is a a little beyond golden brown, you want it slightly gooey, but not doughy. When its finished cooking, remove it from the oven and allow it to cool for about 15-20 minutes before turning it over onto a plate.
 
So, here you go...
'Hello World Wide Web...I'd like you to meet Caramel Apple Monkey Bread...'

can you see the caramel coating those apple slices?  YUM

she really is very friendly, with all those carbs and gooeyness...

and bonus...when she's cooking in the oven she makes your house smell like fall...

I totally forgot that it was August and going to be 100+ that day...

I smelled baking apples and cinnamon...

and I had visions of sweaters and cold noses dancing thru my head!

Now, just to be clear...this was the-one-and-only-thing my children ate for breakfast on Saturday...

but it had apples in it so I figured that the fruit would get them thru till lunch...

and they acted totally 100% like they had eaten Caramel Apple Monkey Bread for breakfast...go figure!

stupid technology

we think technology has made our lives easier...
that we're smarter now that we have all this technology....

like when the boy child ask some question that I never even thought about
and I can whip out my smart phone,
go all wikipedia on that question
and answer the child like I knew the answer all along!
...we think we're smarter...

so, maybe technology has made US smarter...
I think it's also made us stupider...
yep...

example numero 1
neither one of my kids could call their grandparents if you just handed them any-ol phone...
to call grandma they need to be able to find grandma's number on the menu or caller-id...
(not that I knew my grandma's number, but I only talked to her on birthday's and Christmas)
...but my kids talk to their grandma's on a very regular basis...
yet they have never 'dialed' either of their numbers!

take 2
last year our daughter tried to call us from school...
when she was in 5th grade....
she told us our number didn't work...
I asked her what number she called...
that's when I had the pleasure of informing her that calling our address will not make our phone ring...
(blog note...we have now made sure that both our kids know both of our cell numbers! and I quizz them on a regular basis)...
but she had never HAD to 'dial' home before
(if she was calling home, she just looked for 'home' in our cell phone and selected it...then the phone called home magically!)
she's never had to give her number to someone...
I usually have always just texted our number to her friends mother...
and we all just have all of our numbers saved into our phones...
and no-one-ever actually had to 'dial' anyone's number...

third times a charm
I just finished filling out the pile-o-forms for the first week of school...
where you have to put down the emergency contact numbers...
I put down names of friends that I talk to the phone on a regular basis...sometimes multiple times a day...
yet I have no idea what their actual numbers are...
these are the people that I love and trust enough to take care of my child in an emergency if the school can't get ahold of me...
yet I can't tell you their phone number!!!...
but if you give me your number I can msg you their entire vCard (whatever that is) with all of their personal info!!!...
or better yet...
we can just 'bump' our phones together and transfer all that info...
so we never have to even punch in any numbers at all!!!

the big finale
it's a good ol' fashion radio contest...
a chance to win a family vacation, including airplanes and hotels...the kids got giddy with the excitement of this trip we would never win...
kids..."can we mom, can we?  can we call and win the trip?"
me..."sure, just call the number."
girl child...grabs my phone..."how do you dial letters?"
(I explained to her to look for the letters and dial that number)
children giddy with excitement...girl child nervous that she might be on the radio...
silence...
girl child holding phone and smiling
me..."what's going on?"
girl child..."oh, it's just beeping."
me..."it's busy." (with the confidence that she knows what this means...)
girl child...keeps phone up to her ear and continues to listen to the beeping...
me...repeat...'it's busy!"  (maybe she didn't hear me the first time...)
girl child...nodding her head at me and smiling...listening to the beeping...
me..."that mean's you need to hang up and call again."
girl child...blank stare...
this is the point that I realize that neither of my children have ever heard a busy signal or knows what it means...
they know all about call waiting & voice mail...this is what 'normal' phones do when you call and the line is already being used...it doesn't just beep...

I can now confidently tell you that if something horrible 911-calling-appropriate happened and all my children had was a rotary phone...we would probably all die!  because they would have no earthly idea how to use this technology!

they would probably 'dial' 911 by pushing the holes...because my children have never actually 'dialed' a number...they have only ever 'pushed' a number!
so technology could actually kill my family...but only in the event that we were in a home with only rotary phones and a 911-calling-appropriate emergency occurred!
so...we're probably safe!  

oh, hello there

well, hello...

guess I took a summer break!...

lets see....

boychild had a birthday...he chose 'Viva Pinata' as the theme...

yep...random...maybe, someday in the future I may blog about how to throw a Pinata themed birthday...maybe not...

we went to Sunriver, Oregon....BTW this is Oregon...blue skies and trees....

weird things happen sometimes...didn't plan this at all...

we were driving to Sunriver, OR on boy child's actual birthday... 

we were getting hungry for dinner and were passing through Klamath Falls, OR 

(where Beau was born...36+ years ago)...

we asked Wilson what he wanted for dinner...

he said pizza.... 

so, we pull off at the last Klamath Falls exit and follow the signs to Abby's Pizza...

then Beau begins to reminisce 

(he grew up in FAR, FAR northern California, Tulelake...and the "big city" was Klamath Falls......)

guess what/where Beau had for his 7th birthday...

yep, pizza @ Abby's Pizza in Klamath Falls, OR...

I don't think we could have planned that if we wanted to!

while in Sunriver we caught some toads...we were actually officially on 'Toad Patrol'...yep...
might also blog about that...I have some catching up to do...

Sunriver was great...we were with the in-laws...whom I love so very much...
seriously...I married into a great family...
and then my brother-in-law went and married good too...so it's all good....
I don't have any really great pictures from the whole time we were in Sunriver, but take my word for it...we had a great time...
my sister-in-law organized the "Chambers Family Olympics 2012"...
so much fun...games from Minute-2-Win-It...
loved it!

boy child did baseball (t-ball with Jr. Giants...amazing) for the first time this summer...loved it...all of us!...one magical thing about Jr. Giants t-ball...the games are 2 innings/1 hour...that is so.very.magical when you are thinking about baseball in Redding in July!

we took a quick trip to the 'Bay Area' (aka San Francisco & Oakland) with friends to visit the Oakland Zoo and the Exploratorium...fun times...BTW...Oakland WalMart after dark...not AS scary as I would have thought...not that I wasn't a little, teeny-bit scared...but not as bad as I was expecting....

both girl & boy child participated in the YMCA's swim team this summer...which meant I had the opportunity to work-out three mornings every week...or sit by the pool and read...I'll let you decide what I did!

we had a great summer, with lots of fun memories!

and then...before I could blink...the summer was over...and back to school...

boy child off to 2nd grade...

and...gulp...girl child off to middle school...aka jr. high...she is ONLY is 6th grade...I grew up in small-town-Oregon where we had Elementary (k-3), Intermediate (4-6), Jr High (7 & 8), & High School (all the others)...so even though she's technically in middle school...and ONLY in 6th grade...since she's with all these really big kids...and has 6 classes a day...it feels like Jr. High to me...

Okay...now that summer is over and things are back to normal...
I will start to blog again...I have to, I have blogs that have been trying to write themselves in my head and I must get them out of there!