How Clorox Wipes Ruined my Kids

back story for my not-so-short story about ruining my children!

....

so my children are responsible for cleaning their bathroom once a week...

Monday's to be exact...

and they clean the bathroom with non-other than Clorox or Lysol Wipes...you all know you use them...

I tried about 3 years ago to go all green in this area and stop using the cleaning wipes...yeah, that wasn't happening...

anyways, the kids clean every surface of their bathroom minus the inside of the toilet bowl, with the wipes, it works, they get it done, end of story...this is all they have ever used to clean the bathroom...the cleaning wipes and the toilet bowl brush...

summer is in full swing...and that means I have the kids 24/7...

like some home-school mom or something...

and so, things like errands...not happening!  

because taking the kids across town to WalMart to buy things like cleaning wipes and paper towels, when we could actually live without them 

(because in the history of the world we have lived without them), 

is not on my list of things I like to torture myself with...

end of back story...

so, first Monday of summer hits...

kids clean bathroom...all is well...

minus the fact that they used the very last cleaning wipe and failed to inform me...

second Monday of summer hits...

kids go into bathroom to start the cleaning process when they both realize the world has come crashing down around them! 

THERE.ARE.NO.CLEANING.WIPES!

boy child instantly sees this as a miracle releasing them from bathroom cleaning duties...

but girl child knows...

she's old enough to remember back...

back to that black time in history...

when mom went all green and there were no cleaning wipes in the house....

there is some discussing going on in the bathroom...

slight arguing...

boy child is elected to tell me the news about the cleaning wipes, 

probably because he's younger and I would never think to make him clean his own bathroom without the aid of cleaning wipes...

FAIL...I tell them to use...paper towels and cleaning spray...

back to the trenches they go...

then some more arguing...discussing...

girl child emerges now...

..."um...Mom...but there are NO paper towels left...none!"...

confidence has soared...they are golden...

NO cleaning wipes

NO paper towels

that can only mean one thing...NO cleaning the bathroom...

FAIL..apparently I have never introduced them to the wash rag!

what had I done as a mother?  

my children had no idea that they could clean surfaces, other than themselves with a wash rag...

AND that I actually had a stack of wash rags, in a long forgotten cupboard in the garage....

kids clean the bathroom...all goes well...

third Monday of summer hits...

paper towels have been purchased by the husband...

cleaning wipes have yet to be purchased...

because I have not come to the point of running that horrible errand mission...

but kids now know...

they have been educated on the old school ways of cleaning...

they are smart kids...

so, the smart kids that they are...and slightly lazy...

    they know they don't need cleaning wipes...

so, they start thinking outside the box....

do we really need wash rags?...

     all the way out in the garage...

or the paper towels?...

     all the way to the kitchen...

no, we can think outside the 'cleaning wipe' box that our mother held us in for so long...

and look, there is this roll of paper that we use to clean our bums...

why would that paper not work to clean the rest of the bathroom?

oh, and that cleaning spray...

     it's all the way under the bathroom sink...

     we'd have to like, open the cupboard door to get that...

but look, there is soap right here sitting nicely on the counter...

     nice soap...foamy Bath-&-Body Works soap...

     that's good enough to clean our hands...

     must be good enough to clean the entire bathroom...

     ...including the mirror...

yes...you read that right...

my children 'cleaned' their bathroom with toilet paper and not-so-cheap Bath-&-Body Works foamy soap!...their entire bathroom...

yes...Clorox Wipes have ruined my children...

and now I'm off to buy stock in them!

on another note

...so you know how it goes...
you're in the car with a friend...
tunes turned up...
favorite song comes on...
....
and then you realize that you actually don't know the real words to the song because your friend just pointed out how those words you've been singing for years are wrong...
...
oh, so that's never happened to you...
well, it happened to the girl child this week...


the girl, the boy and I are sitting in the car...
the girl starts singing
the song...Bon Jovi's Shot Through the Heart...


her version...
"Shot through the heart, 
and you're too late...
You need love, a bad mate"
...
me-"Um, what did you just sing?"
girl-"The song"
me-"Yes, but what words did you just sing to that song?"
girl-"Shot through the heart, and you're too late... You need love, a bad mate"
me-giggles
boy-giggles
girl-"what?"
me-"those aren't the words."
girl-"really?"
me-"You need love, a bad mate, isn't even a sentence"
girl-"well, it's a song and songs sometimes don't make sense."
....
and she's right...


and FYI the words are
Shot through the heart,
And you're to blame
You give love a bad name


so, what song did you sing wrong until you figured it out?

if only

I had a friend share this picture with me this week after I posted something about certain store employees  on my facebook and their lack of math skills...

(the store shall remain nameless, lets just say...if your prices are falling, maybe you should teach your employees the math that goes along with those falling prices!)

just wanted to share the picture with you...
I think it'd be even better if they had a picture of 2 hands and a foot...

& then when a person does have more than 15 items the cashier also has some life size rubber hands and a foot that she/he breaks out and helps the person count using actual fingers & toes...

AND then makes them pack back up their stuff
& get into a regular...
non-express...lane...
if this happened once to them then they would never ever again go to the express lane with 42 items!

cake pop

my version...
making a popsicle flavor cake...

Creamsicle Cake

okay...confession...

just because

let me introduce you to a new friend of mine

Marcel...he (maybe she, I'm not sure) cracks me up

tell me you're not laughing...or at least smiling
'I have shoes and a face and I like that about myself'...

and take 2

hope you enjoy your day...